Mar 11, 2010

Can You Influence Your Dreams to Include Certain People?

If you can control your dreams, can you influence your dreams to include certain people? With the right practice and the appropriate dream inducement, you could be speaking to people you haven’t seen in awhile, famous historical figures, stars and entertainers, and even heads of state. I know I wouldn’t mind having a little one one one with Obama right now. (Can you tell me what you are really trying to accomplish with your medical program because I’m getting a little confused!?).

In fact, talking to specific individuals is one reason why people want to learn to control their dreams.

It’s important to remember, though, that talking to a specific person in your dreams is not like you were really talking to them. I mean, if your Aunt Alice passed away ten years ago and you want to ask her why she didn’t tell anyone where her custom made wedding ring was kept, you aren’t likely to get an answer in your dream. Your dreams will only include pieces of information you really know – pieces of information already stored in your brain. You aren’t really talking to dear Aunt Alice – you’d be talking to your memories or impersonation of Aunt Alice.

That doesn’t mean that talking to the people you want to talk to again isn’t worthwhile. As I’ve mentioned, there is a lot of information stored in your brain that you’ve simply forgot how to access. All of those childhood memories – even what happened last week – can get covered up with more recent memories and information.

It can be extremely cathartic to talk to your loved ones in your dreams.

I was 9 1/2 when my maternal grandmother passed away. I loved her to pieces. She introduced me to Benji (anyone remember Benji the dog?) and Animal Kingdom. She loved animals, wrote snippets of poetry, and a great laugh. When she died, my brothers and sister and I did not go to her funeral. I don’t know that at that age I would have understood what it would mean to miss her funeral and I was probably very glad at the time not to have to go – I was sad enough, as it was. However, years later I had dream about my grandmother that I’ve never forgotten.

I was maybe 13 at the time. In my dream, I went to the mall by our house and found a little cave with a small wooden door tucked away along one of the side hallways of the mall. I don’t know what led me to the hallway or the door of the cave nor why I wasn’t afraid to go in, but I wasn’t afraid at all. Inside, I found my grandmother snug and comfortable in a little home she’d made for herself. She looked as if she’d been expecting me and a pot of tea was brewing on her small stove. She pulled out a chair and poured me a cup and there we sat and talked for what felt like hours.

I had a chance to hug her, to tell her how much I missed her, and to learn that she was doing fine (she told me). When I woke up, I felt so much closer to my grandmother. I felt as if I’d finally had my chance to say goodbye while also having opened up a new way to talk to her.

I know I wasn’t really talking to her, although for many more years I would believe that was the case (I was a teenager – we’ll believe all kinds of things at that age that get shaken out along the way to becoming a responsible adult with children of our own). I do still, though, believe that any time I’m missing her, I can just go visit her in the place I last saw her. I can talk to her in my dreams.

How to Call Certain People in Your Dreams

Unfortunately, it’s not as easy as laying down to sleep at night and saying “Gees, I’d like to talk to grandma tonight.” Do you know how many dreams you have that you don’t even remember having? According to the Psychology department at UC Santa Cruz, adults have anywhere from 4-6 dreams a night. Do you remember 4-6 dreams every morning? I know you don’t!

If you want to talk to someone particular, you need to work on a couple of skills. First, you need to have really strong dream recall. Many of us remember an occasional dream or two every month but you can increase your dream recall by writing down what you remember each morning.

Next, you want to gain the ability to dream lucidly so that you are aware you are dreaming. This leads to the ability to influence what happens in your dreams.

And, finally, in order to dream about a specific person, you need to induce that dream with memories that will put your mind in tune with dreaming about that person:

• look at their picture before bed

• play their favorite music while you sleep

• write stories about your time with that person or your knowledge of that person right before going to sleep

• watch videos of that person while you fall asleep, if you have any available

If you influence your dreams to include certain people, have a plan for what you want to accomplish in the dream. Do you want to spend the time talking, is there something you want to learn from them, do you want to know the answer to some deep question? You might not get the answers you expect, but you may find bits of buried information in your brain that are worth dragging up and out of the dark attic in which we store some incredibly valuable insights.

Mar 10, 2010

Benefits of Lucid Dreaming

There are both social and health related benefits of lucid dreaming. Being in control of your dreams is a confidence builder that extends into your waking life. It’s like having a resource for personal guidance – your inner self. And who knows YOU better than YOU?

Some equate lucid dreaming to a personal virtual reality play land. For those who enjoy role playing games, it is the ultimate role playing fantasy. You have control over your setting, the characters, the action, and the outcomes.

Being aware of your dream state and having that kind of influence over events, however, has practical uses, as well.

Stop Having Nightmares

Nightmares play out our worst internal fears using symbols to make those fears seem surreal, life-threatening and life-like. If you can unleash your ability to control your dreams, you have the ability to stop a nightmare in its tracks.

Rehearse Important Events

Nervous about an upcoming speech or interview? Rehearse the event in your dreams. Practice what you want to say. The experience can be just as rewarding and valuable as if you were rehearsing live.

Unlock Your Creativity

Have you ever woken from a dream you thought would make an incredible story? Your mind is so free to create fantastical plot lines, characters and backgrounds. For many of us, the creativity we experience in our dreams far surpasses what we’re capable of producing when we are awake. Improving dream recall and exerting some influence over the movie in your head can expand the creativity your capable of when you are awake. Many fiction writers get their ideas for stories from their dreams.

Build Self Confidence

The benefits of lucid dreaming extend into other areas of our daily lives. As a girl, I was always incredibly shy. Those who are not, who seem to ooze charisma and self-confidence seem to have so many more doors open to them seemingly without any difficulty at all. It’s difficult being shy and constantly afraid of being the center of attention or of making a fool of yourself in front of others. In your dreams, you can practice being more social. You can design situations where you are in more control, where you have the confidence you want to possess in real life, where you are the one who has new doors open to them.

Boost Your Will Power

Athletes are taught to “experience the win”. They are told to visualize themselves making the touchdown, crossing the finish line first, or performing the perfect play. Visualizing such success helps establish a focus on the main objective. You can use dream control to do the same for your own personal goals. Those who want to lose weight can use their dreams to visualize themselves going to the gym or starting a new exercise program, having more control over what they choose to eat, and seeing themselves become thinner as a result. Once you see yourself going to the gym and feeling great from an incredible workout in your dreams, you can more easily encourage yourself to do the same in real life.

Heal Emotional Stress

You’ve seen those charts that show you how stressful certain life events can be? Losing a job, breaking up with a boyfriend or girlfriend, going through a divorce or moving to a new city can all be emotionally stressful. Sometimes we don’t even realize how much that stress is affecting us until we start wondering why we are so tired or grouchy all the time. Use your dreams to see yourself overcoming whatever stressful situation you are going through and design the future you want to have. You’ll be establishing a set of positive emotions that will help override the natural stress of everyday challenges.

The benefits of lucid dreaming can touch all aspects of your life – your creative output, your emotional well-being, and your self-esteem. What could you create if you literally held the brush and the pen for every dream you had from now on?